Godparenting: A spiritual calling

By Dr. Jeff Mirus ( bio - articles - email ) | Feb 11, 2026

Being a Godparent is one of the most frequently misunderstood of Catholic responsibilities. On the one hand, it is not merely a ceremonial nicety for the baptism of a child. On the other hand, it is usually difficult for Godparents to be frequently present in the lives of their Godchildren. Indeed, even when Godparents have been carefully selected by highly-committed Catholic parents the chances of a Godparent living in close proximity to a Godchild for an extended period of time are relatively slim.

In other words, unless the child’s parents are significantly committed to their faith, they will not pay much spiritual attention to their choice of Godparents. But even with exemplary spiritual attention to that choice, the opportunity for most Godparents to have a close relationship with their Godchildren during their formative years is virtually non-existent. For this reason alone, we can see that the most important role of Godparents is to pray for their Godchildren—not just once in a while but regularly, preferably each and every day.

Given the obstacles to hands-on God-parenting, even an excellent little book like Fr. Jeffrey Kirby’s Beyond the Baptism: Being a Catholic Godparent (new from Our Sunday Visitor) may miss the mark in most cases when it devotes a chapter to “The Ministry of Accompaniment” for Godparents. I can recommend this book for parents in choosing Godparents and for Godparents in taking their role seriously, but in today’s highly mobile society the possibility of a close personal relationship between a Godparent and a Godchild must be exceedingly rare. The problem is clear: Unless Godparents are naturally active participants in the familial life of their Godchildren, Godparents can very seldom play a direct, personal and formative role in their Godchildren’s lives.

Closeness in Prayer

When such formative interaction exists, of course, it is very important. But in the majority of cases today, effective Godparenting is going to come down to two factors. The most obvious of the two is daily prayer for the Godchild. The reality is that those who do not have a direct, personal, formative influence on a Godchild will have to rely instead on God to provide the graces necessary for the Godchild’s spiritual well-being, including those special experiential graces which lead the Godchild to desire a close relationship with Christ.

But the less obvious factor is the holiness of the Godparents themselves. Godparents need to be convinced that having a Godchild is an additional reason for them to strive for closeness to God with an increasing readiness to do His will each and every day. Such an aspiration begins with regular prayer, reception of the sacraments, ongoing spiritual formation, and a habitual examination of conscience. The most effective path for a successful Godparent is the cultivation of a holiness that is spiritually attentive not only to God but to those children who now have the right to the Godparent’s prayers, sacrifices and spiritual love.

Parents, of course, have many serious natural responsibilities in addition to their supernatural ones, and a parent can fail spectacularly through either supernatural or natural irresponsibility. But in the overwhelming majority of cases, the role of Godparents is supernatural. Most Godparents will not be in a position to do much naturally for their Godchildren. A Godparent will seldom even be the person designated by parents to raise their children in the event of their own premature death. A Godparent’s role is very infrequently a natural role; as a rule it is decidedly a supernatural role. This is, in fact, the primary reason that parents should have the supernatural wellbeing of their children in mind as the primary criterion for selecting Godparents.

Sorting it out later

Indeed, in the vast majority of cases, the efficacy of a Godparent is something that will not be discerned in this life, but only in the next. I do not mean to denigrate the natural ways in which Godparents may be able to exercise a positive influence in this life. If those opportunities exist, they should be taken, but in many and probably most cases the instability of modern communities will make them rare. That is why—and to a considerable extent it has always been why—the role of the Godparent must be expected to be supernatural, not natural.

In other words, while effective parenting depends primarily on a total formation that integrates the natural with the supernatural, effective God-parenting depends primarily on spiritual gifts. And as parents may be justly faulted for not providing for both the natural and supernatural needs of their children, so that their mature growth as human persons may proceed in an orderly way, Godparents are rightly faulted for the failure to offer those superabundant spiritual gifts which alone can salvage the child if the more measurable influences should fail.

It is not that the parents’ role is only natural. Nothing I have written here can possibly be construed in that sense. But in the vast majority of cases—and indeed, by the very nature of the role itself—the Godparents’ role is at least primarily and very generally exclusively supernatural. Parents need to understand this when they select Godparents for their children. And Godparents need to understand this when they accept such a noble commission.

In its essence, then, Godparenting has no earthly use. It is a heavenly commission designed solely to serve God’s salvific will. It exists so that God’s love may be not only received, but returned.