PRIEST DARES TO CALL CARDINAL PELL INFLEXIBLE

By Diogenes ( articles ) | Aug 22, 2004

That's the heavy-breathing headline to Kelly Burke's Sydney Morning Herald article concerning a forward-thinking priest with an appreciation of diversity and discreetly highlighted hair who's in a pet with his boss.

Kelly dear, for the sake of any readers we have in common, let's review Peter Damien's Basics for Bishops:

• "Inflexible" is GOOD.


• "Flexible" is BAD.


• You WANT clergymen who don't bend over easily.

The Church in the U.S. is a young one, but there are a few areas in which her faithful can speak with the authority born of experience. We've got enough Dash-2 retirees (benched "because of illness or other grave reason," according to Canon 401 §2) to field a rugby union side, and what we can't tell you about gummy bear bishops isn't worth knowing.

If you still doubt us, Kelly, get the Australian and U.S. nuncios in on a conference call. In exchange for Pell, we'll swap you any twenty flexible bishops you name -- and just to show we mean business, we'll throw-in a slightly used Buick Regal, gratis.

What can be fairer than that?