And if the lavender mafia causes you to sin...

By Diogenes (articles ) | May 19, 2005

Based on today's Gospel reading, what would be the most logical way for a bishop to deal with reports that a homosexual network had set up in the diocesan seminary?

  • Assume the reports are false. If they come from laymen, tell them they're being uncharitable. If they come from seminarians, get those young men out of the system.
  • Promote the men who are said to be members of the network. That way, everyone will know you aren't going to be intimidated by rumors.
  • Issue a statement affirming Church teachings on human sexuality.
  • Install a new rector. Tell him to be discreet. Tell everyone to be discreet.
  • Tell people who complain that you're taking action, but it's essential to keep things quiet for the good of the Church.
What? You say that list of options is incomplete? There's another way to deal with these things? I wouldn't know.

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  • Posted by: Eusebuis1 - May. 19, 2005 1:28 PM ET USA

    Nominate your priests who have helped on sexual abuse case to become Bishops. You know that the USCCB to get support your nomination to the Vatican. Your priests prequalified for this higher position.

  • Posted by: Fr. William - May. 19, 2005 11:50 AM ET USA

    Yes, Diogenes, as you well note, the options are incomplete. Mark 9: "Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe (in me) to sin, it would be better for him if a great millstone were put around his neck and he were thrown into the sea. If your hand causes you to sin, cut it off. It is better for you to enter into life maimed than with two hands to go into Gehenna, into the unquenchable fire." May the bishops have the heart of THE Shepherd and the courage to "cut off" the lavendar mafia.

  • Posted by: - May. 19, 2005 11:32 AM ET USA

    Diogenes nails it again! I vividly remember one instance when I tried to contact my local Bishop because our parish Priest claimed during his Sunday Homily that we didn't have spiritual souls! I was told: "Thanks for telling us. Now keep quiet, we're dealing with it". And guess who is still preaching his heresies...

  • Posted by: - May. 19, 2005 9:50 AM ET USA

    What, you don't know? After all these years of seeing so many bishops excel at tap dancing? These guys are really great--like Fred and Gene--only in their cassocks. Watch them do that ol number, "Me and My Shadow" with cane and top hat! And then those splits! Incredible performances. Now what was the problem that we we dealing with, I mean the dancing prelates?