This is only a test...

By Diogenes (articles ) | Jun 08, 2005

Reuters is confused, I'm afraid:

OTTAWA (Reuters) - Nine North American Catholic women will be ordained priests or deacons next month in what will amount to a test of Pope Benedict's determination to enforce the Vatican's ban on women's ordination.

Come, now: Is this a "test" for the Pope, or an eccentric fantasy played out by a small female cast? If I told you that my Uncle Harry has proclaimed himself the Holy Roman Emperor, would you conclude that Harry is testing the legitimacy of the European Union? Or that Harry is a garden-variety nutcase?

And a shrewd reporter might have noticed that there's more than a touch of loopiness in the story of the would-be priestesses. The evidence is there:

The July 25 ceremony will take place on a boat on the St. Lawrence River in a bid to be in international waters, the coordinator said on Tuesday, though the U.S.-Canadian border actually goes down the middle of the river.

What I want to know is why these women want to be in international waters, when intergalactic orbit would seem so much more appropriate.

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  • Posted by: Sterling - Jun. 11, 2005 1:13 PM ET USA

    International waters makes them outside the jurisdiction of any country, of course, though one wonders if they think Canada is going to arrest them, or if the Vatican is going to send in a Black Hawk helicopter. What they're really seeking - and can't find - is somewhere outside the jurisdiction of God. Good luck.

  • Posted by: - Jun. 09, 2005 6:00 PM ET USA

    They probably want to be in international waters because of the old canonical analyses under the Pio-Benedictine Code of 1917.

  • Posted by: Fr. William - Jun. 09, 2005 3:05 PM ET USA

    First, let's not use the word "ordination" with regard to this fairy tale being played out by a few radical feminist idealogues. Jesus Christ and His Church have made it clear that women cannot be ordained to the Sacred Priesthood of Jesus Christ. This has been, is now and always will be a Teaching of the Church. Second, nuke 'em.

  • Posted by: - Jun. 09, 2005 10:05 AM ET USA

    Are international waters outside the jurisdiction of the Vatican? I think not. Anyone who claims to be a Roman Catholic is under the jurisdiction of the Vatican whether they like it or not.

  • Posted by: - Jun. 09, 2005 9:21 AM ET USA

    Si Rahasia: hilarious. Thank you.

  • Posted by: Venerable Aussie - Jun. 08, 2005 8:22 PM ET USA

    Surely folks there must be humour in this to cheer us up? They FLOAT this idea to make WAVES, grab the attention of CURRENT affairs types like Reuters who then go OVERBOARD in their analysis. Methinks all need a STERN warning! BTW, as an antipodean I'm a little rusty on my North American geography, but is there any chance of a wayward iceberg in the St Lawrence? I'm worried too that the good ladies might stray into Canadian waters and find themselves married to each other instead of "ordained".

  • Posted by: Vincit omnia amor - Jun. 08, 2005 6:52 PM ET USA

    Thanks for the info on Blue Diamond. I thought intergalactic space was part of the Diocese of St. Pete's where Cape Canaveral is?

  • Posted by: Gil125 - Jun. 08, 2005 5:35 PM ET USA

    Correction: Blue Diamond produces almonds (and some hazelnuts). The Diamond co-op produces walnuts. Let's make the ladies in the story as nutty as Blue Diamond's almonds. They process 1/3 of the world's supply every year. Sounds about right for the---what will they call themselves? Mothers? Fatheresses?

  • Posted by: - Jun. 08, 2005 5:27 PM ET USA

    They are in international waters so that a sighting of the Loch Ness Presbyter can be confirmed by Reuters.

  • Posted by: Gil125 - Jun. 08, 2005 5:06 PM ET USA

    Hannah, click on the links to the story in the right-hand column on the home page. Two German bishops (female, of course) will do the ordaining. Diogenes, the answer to your question about your (I hope fictional) Uncle Harry, who (I'm sure did not) proclaim himself Holy Roman Emperor, is that he is a garden-variety nutcase. But if he is, these ladies are the entire Blue Diamond Walnut crop since 1995. Maybe 1895.

  • Posted by: - Jun. 08, 2005 4:25 PM ET USA

    And how many at Reuters, a blue-chipper of the media establishment, still won't recognize internet reporters or well organized bloggers as legitimate news outlets? But nine feminists floating in un-international waters on the Good Ship Lollipop going through the actions of a ceremony with as much authority and Christian roots as a KKK rally, and they're mavericks? How long before Reuters realizes nobody's listening anymore?

  • Posted by: - Jun. 08, 2005 4:17 PM ET USA

    The movement started with the ordination of seven women on the Danube River in Germany in 2002. Two of them, Christine Mayr-Lumetzberger of Austria and Gisela Forster of Germany, will be ordaining the four priests and five deacons on the St. Lawrence. The two say they have been made bishops by Catholic bishops in good standing with Rome. Alas, I can't dismiss that claim out of hand anymore: probably some dissenting bishop somewhere is vain enough to attempt it.

  • Posted by: - Jun. 08, 2005 1:10 PM ET USA

    Boy , if that doesn't show how twisted Reuters has legitimate coverage to kooks and kookiness. Wonder why they never mentioned just who will be doing the ordaining?

  • Posted by: - Jun. 08, 2005 12:41 PM ET USA

    I somehow sense the fine, manicured fingers of Bishop McCormack manipulating the subtext of Reuters' story. Excommunication is ill-advised; simply ignoring the charade is far better. As I've said before, the Vatican ruined Sr. Joan Chittister's (BTW, I don't care if I've spelled her name incorrectly) plans for martyrdom when they simply ignored her defiance of a Vatican order for her not to declaim, once again, on womens' ordination. Poor thing hasn't been the same since.

  • Posted by: - Jun. 08, 2005 12:00 PM ET USA

    UFOs prefer water landings I'm told thus the water. Less evidence of their existence. Suppose a group of people started insisting that all dogs now be identified as mallard ducks? These women can not be priests anymore than than than the dogs can be re-identified as ducks. The dog is still a dog and the women are still not priests. These new ducks would still be unable to fly and the women still can't consecrate the bread and wine. Duck season sure would be intersting though.

  • Posted by: - Jun. 08, 2005 10:36 AM ET USA

    Ah, these brave, brave souls. Truly trail blazers in a society that is known for its strict religious orthodoxy where dissidents are sent to the gulags often disguised as seminaries re-education centers for the lax Protestants. Certain to be pilloried by a hostile media, these fine neo-druidic ladies will valiantly stare down the immense public opprobrium certain to be cast upon them. Certainly we can all wish them well as they launch off on their new and latest vocation down the river.

  • Posted by: shrink - Jun. 08, 2005 10:12 AM ET USA

    Come, come, Diogenes. Everyone knows that intergalactic space is claimed by the Vatican!