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Let us greet our presider with #391 in the green hymnbooks

By Diogenes (articles ) | Dec 17, 2004

Archbishop Flynn said sash-wearers would not be denied Communion because members of the movement had assured him in writing that their presence was not in protest of church teachings. -- news item

Holy Name

The original of the following hymn was found in a previously undiscovered folio of the Deutsches Volksgesangbuch (c. 1631). I have hazarded my own provisional translation.

(sung -- with due solemnity -- to the tune of Tannenbaum)

O Rainbow Sash, O Rainbow Sash,
How welcome your distractions!
O Rainbow Sash, O Rainbow Sash,
You trigger fierce reactions:

Your colors dazzle children's eyes
Before they've learned to sodomize.

O Rainbow Sash, O Rainbow Sash,
Replacing faith with factions!

O Rainbow Sash, O Rainbow Sash,
You help our lads and lasses
Unconsciously make liturgy
Into revolting masses:

Your turn their pure and pious prayers
To thoughts of rectal tissue tears.

O Rainbow Sash, O Rainbow Sash,
How soon their worship passes!

O Rainbow Sash, O Rainbow Sash,
You're just a strip of cotton.
If mom objects to crypto-sex
You prove her heart is rotten.

Like Joseph's many-colored robes
You herald death of homophobes.

O Rainbow Sash, O Rainbow Sash,
Conception ill-begotten!

O Rainbow Sash, O Rainbow Sash,
You needn't fear ejection.
Our flag deploy, since you enjoy
The bishop's staunch protection.

Whoever your six colors wears
His monochrome conviction bares.

O Rainbow Sash, O Rainbow Sash,
He shares your sole affection!

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Show 3 Comments? (Hidden)Hide Comments
  • Posted by: Dan 149 - Dec. 19, 2004 12:00 PM ET USA

    Great, the Rainbow Sash is welcome, the Legion of Christ and Regnum Christi is officially suppressed. This, only days before the Holy Father gives his personal approval to the Regnum Christi constitutions, gives the Legion control of a major church in the Holy Land, and holds a private audience with 6,000 members of the Legion and Regnum Christi. The Rainbow Sash is "in line" with the Church's teaching and the Legion of Christ is not. Nonsense!.

  • Posted by: - Dec. 17, 2004 2:02 PM ET USA

    EXCELLENT! You should mail it to the Archbishop! You can say that you wrote it in honor of the fact that catholiclesbians.org has listed the following in his archdiocese as being "gay and lesbian friendly": St. Francis Cabrini, St. Joan of Arc, St. Stephen --Minneapolis University of St. Thomas University of St. Catherine Archbishop Flynn is tolerant of everything except orthodoxy.

  • Posted by: - Dec. 17, 2004 10:35 AM ET USA

    I hope you've applied for a copyright. Oh, and wouldn't it be #391 in the lavender hymnbook?

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