By Diogenes (articles ) | March 31, 2004 2:21 AM
Hello, and welcome to the Bishop O'Brien Help Hotline®. Your call is important to us! Please listen to the HelpLine options and select the one that corresponds to your need.
For information on the Kiwanis Klassic Bike-a-Thon, press One.
For this week's Maricopa County Schools lunch menus, press Three.
For an intimate, personalized conversation with a burly non-smoking Capricorn with a Roman JCL and fabulous pecs, press Five.
To learn how you can help close the School of the Americas, press Six.
To hear a recording of Rosemary Ruether's 1986 Horizons for Justice address, press Nine.
To suggest how we can serve you better, press Theta.
To keep your tee-shot straight when using a wood, don't press.
If you have an emergency requiring the assistance of Bishop O'Brien, please contact the law offices of Benítez, Rocha, Rosenberg y Lobos, Avenida Luis de Llúria 44, Concepión, Santo Domingo. Be sure to include a stamped, self-addressed envelope and indicate clearly the nature of your problem. Hello, and welcome to the Bishop O'Brien Help Hotline®. Your call is important to us!
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