Ten Best Dressed

By Diogenes ( articles ) | May 22, 2003

Many progressive priests have grown beyond cassock-and-biretta "Ghetto Catholicism":

Just three years ago, John Furdek was preaching before a Villa Park congregation. Today, the former pastor of St. Alexander Catholic Church is in prison for using the Internet to arrange a drug deal and sexual encounter with a 14-year-old boy in Wisconsin. Furdek, 50, was sentenced in Racine County Circuit Court Monday to 15 years in prison for attempted second-degree sexual assault of a child.

Gammarelli Catalogue: Superior Tailoring for Fashion-Conscious Ecclesiastics

Spring 2003

THE SAN QUENTIN. Sassy orange jumpsuit in cotton-poly blend will wow them when you're swinging your weed-whip along the Interstate berm! When Ordinary Time is "hard time," you'll love the cool collarless neckline and high inseam. As pictured, $700. Leg chains not included.

THE DEFENDANT. Thinking of jumping bail? This desert camo combo will help you go places! Sturdy twill trousers and reversible jacket double as evening wear in Costa Rica. As pictured, $960.

THE PENNIES FROM LEAVENWORTH. Ahoy there! Naughty Navy Chaplains inspired this fetching fatigue cover-all in delectable denim. Reinforced knee and elbow keeps you in style at work and at play. As pictured, $750. Stenciling extra.

THE SOLEDAD. Chancellor took chances? Put him in our pantses! Striped top lends a "Latin touch" to this pert polyester pair. Velcro waist-tabs prevent those little slips and suicides that can make a party go phut. As pictured, $600. (hint, hint: Ask about our volume discounts!)

THE INCOGNITO. Wonderfully washable windbreaker is perfect for draping over your head when being pushed into the back of a police cruiser after sentencing. Manly tan twill makes an important fashion statement, and resists fading from Klieg lights and electronic flash. It appeals as often as you do! As pictured, $300.