Episcopal Rhetoric quiz

By Diogenes ( articles ) | Nov 08, 2005

Which of the following paragraphs was actually written by an American prelate, about a meeting for priests of his diocese, and which are parodies?

• We will have some expert guides to bring us through the discussions of this brief period, and I am sure that our liturgies will be filled with life and beauty and will be models that we can all bring back to our own parishes and institutions. The best part of the assembly, of course, will be the chance to share with old friends, with classmates of seminary days, and with former pastors and associates the great stories that make up the lore of this mysterious, challenging and demanding vocation. The conversations along the walks and country lanes, the pleasant meals together, the exchange of insights and concerns, of joys and sorrows - this is what brings us together and what strengthens us to serve you and all God's beloved people in the Archdiocese of Washington.
• I write you about this for two reasons. The first is to tell you that God has really blessed this local Church with truly great priests. There is not one of them who is perfectly like any other. They are all different and that is the wonderful part of it. Oh, I would be telling a lie if I tell you that they all see their ministry exactly as I do, but that is the strength of this presbyterate, and it makes us able to learn from each other, to love each other and to be better able to serve you all. God has given us wise and prayerful men, learned and pastoral men, optimists and realists, serious and jovial, great preachers and great counselors, and He has pulled it all together and given you the best He has. I am very proud of the priests of Washington, their dedication, their hard work and their spirit of joyful fraternity. I am honored to be one of them.
• Please pray for all of us during this convocation. Some parishes may be inconvenienced somewhat by the fact that their priests are not around. Hopefully, our absence will give you an even greater idea of what the Church would be without the priests we need to serve us.

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Answer

Did you guess? The correct answer is that all those gems came from Cardinal McCarrick. Parody is impossible.