Click here to advertise on CatholicCulture.org

Top Ten Reasons for Thinking Your Pastor is an Archconservative

By Diogenes (articles ) | Nov 07, 2003

10. Says, "the Holy Father" instead of "this current pope"
9. Earring in neither ear
8. Genuflects before tabernacle when church is empty
7. No "Visualize World Peace" bumper sticker on the CYO van
6. Wears jeans only when changing shock absorbers
5. Can recite Apostles' Creed without a crib card
4. Fails to hide videos and DVDs when his mother visits
3. Celebrates more than four consecutive masses without "On Eagle's Wings"
2. Omits mention of Magic Johnson in Prayers of the Faithful
1. Breviary "just opens" to Invitatory

An appeal from our founder, Dr. Jeffrey Mirus:

Dear reader: If you found the information on this page helpful in your pursuit of a better Catholic life, please support our work with a donation. Your donation will help us reach seven million Truth-seeking readers worldwide this year. Thank you!

Progress toward our July expenses ($34,059 to go):
$35,000.00 $941.00
97% 3%
Sound Off! CatholicCulture.org supporters weigh in.

All comments are moderated. To lighten our editing burden, only current donors are allowed to Sound Off. If you are a donor, log in to see the comment form; otherwise please support our work, and Sound Off!

Show 2 Comments? (Hidden)Hide Comments
  • Posted by: hUMPTY dUMPTY - Nov. 08, 2003 3:18 PM ET USA

    Orders a Domino's Pizza sent to Ave Maria College in Florida

  • Posted by: - Nov. 07, 2003 8:28 PM ET USA

    Reason 5.1: Doesn't say "...for us - harrumph - and for our salvation..." during the recitation of the Creed...

Subscribe for free
Shop Amazon
Click here to advertise on CatholicCulture.org

Recent Catholic Commentary

A Baptist leader with a message the Synod of Bishops should hear June 30
'Helpful' advice for social conservatives: ignore causes, deal with effects June 30
In the Aftermath of Obergefell June 30
The political outlook after Obergefell June 29
Good news/bad news on the Vatican PR overhaul June 29

Top Catholic News

Most Important Stories of the Last 30 Days
Pope approves process for holding bishops accountable in abuse cases CWN - June 10
Pope Francis’ 2nd encyclical released (includes link to full text) CWN - June 18
US Supreme Court rules all states must recognize same-sex marriage CWN - June 26
Archbishop Nienstedt, auxiliary bishop resign CWN - June 15
Cardinal Kasper: Pope never approved my proposal CWN - June 4